Just a laid back day

Finally slept almost all night...woke up at 5:30, yay! Too bad I had to take Sominex to do it. Laid around, watched tv movies, gamed a little, rested a lot. Josh and Allyson took us out to lunch which was good, but I don't think weigh day is going to be a success tomorrow. Oh, well, time to do a u-turn and get back to the healthy way of eating.

I'm striking the d-word from my vocabulary. That would be 'diet' to you and me. I'm just going to eat healthy and continue exercising. It will come off slowly, but it WILL come off. I got a jump start with Atkins, but that's no way to eat for the rest of my life. I'm choosing a 10-20-30 approach (kind of like the Zone), gonna watch the calories in, calories out thing, walk at least 30 minutes a day, do some free weights a couple of times a week, take my vitamins, journal my food intake and drink plenty of water. Be healthy and everything else will fall into place, right?
I'm bored and I need snuggles. Wonder what it be like to have someone hug me everyday and kiss me goodbye or hello or for any dumb reason at all? Considering my touchlessness, I would probably hate it. Yeh, I'll keep telling myself that. Maybe then my life won't seem so grim. It's hard to believe I've been married almost 22 years. That doesn't seem so long until you have had to live it. That's not fair, I guess. It hasn't always been bad...or that bad for all that. Certain memories like when Allyson was born, or our 1st trip to Estero Island or sledding on an air mattress in Missouri...good times.
The sad part is that as lonely and alone and sad as I am, he probably is too. There's a song that goes "there was this woman and there was this man and there was this moment they had a chance to hold on to what they had"...guess we just never had enough to try to hold on to. Sad, desperately, terribly sad.